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The Petty Narcissist

by Jason Shand

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1.
Seeing You (Eyes Wide Open) 06:36
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How are you I guess I know just how you're doing being that I spoke to you an hour ago Anyway I've started to feel a little low so I hope you don't mind I need to make things better I need to vent my frustrations to a friend before I go mad from this isolation that I've placed myself in I'm barely hanging on I remember seeing you laying there eyes wide open wondering if it would all get better I remember seeing you laying there eyes wide open hey… didn't it all get better How are you I know you know just how I'm doing Being that We barely spoke an hour ago I'm in these shoes these are shoes you wore not long ago I've been overcome by a bitter emptiness I need to vent my frustrations to a friend before I go mad from this isolation that I've placed myself in I'm barely hanging on It's so cold out here lovers have come and gone now you're the only one left here to depend on I need you I remember seeing you laying there eyes wide open wondering if it would all get better I remember seeing you laying there eyes wide open Hey… didn't it all get better I remember seeing you Wondering didn’t it all get better I remember seeing you Wondering didn’t it all get better JS
2.
Say You Love Me (Please Stay) 04:03
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Always feel your presence Under my skin Even in your absence Only you can fill This void within This void within my bleeding heart It’s bleeding for you I think that you want me but you won’t release yourself from this fear you hold onto you’ve got to let go Say you love me Say you want me And please stay Please stay Try to keep my distance Cards close to burning chest I’m biding my time I suffer through this soul’s unrest This soul’s unrest May be my undoing I am dying to reveal myself I’m standing here with an open heart this is crazy But I know nothing ventured is nothing to gain Say you love me Say you want me And please stay Please stay Now deep down I know that you want me Why don’t you release yourself from this fear you hold onto Just let it go And say you love me Say you want me And please stay Please stay Say you love me Say you want me Say you want me Say you love me And please stay Please stay JS
3.
$$$ In The Bank ( Let Go) 04:01
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You know how hard That I've been trying To keep you well And keep you safe You know by now There's no denying So why then look The other way Maybe it's time To make a change... we... Maneuver In and out of pain You don't know The way you feel But I've got something That is real I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money You say there's No end to beginning We circle back To start again These habits We've grown used to feeding You know we've got to Stop this bleeding Where there's a will There is a way... we... Before we try To make a change Just let me show You how I feel Yes I've got something That is real I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money It's so hard To let go It's so hard To grow apart From the one I want You want me to let go You want me to let go You want me to let go You want me to let go You want me to let go You want me to let go But I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money Bank bank Bank bank I've got the money You want me to let go You want me to let go let go I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money in the Bank bank I've got the money I've got the money JS
4.
The Petty Narcissist (Arctic Ocean) 04:58
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I see you in the distance Wondering if you'll come Around there’s been a Strong wind blowing In uncertainty Towards us There's a quick slick get away From something That is feeling wrong It's a long way down I can see you Stand in judgement of me I can feel the Arctic Ocean In your soul It's a long way down Your camouflage flash color Made me look the other way Forgiveness is a long Road travelled From you and Your glory days Now tell me was I ever good enough Now I see thru all the haze To the core of you I can feel your waters rising on me Drowning in your Arctic Ocean And it’s so cold It’s a long way... I’m trying to find my way I’m trying to find my way Oh I'm trying to find my way The Petty Narcissist Feeds himself Before his kids I’m left to wonder Oh my God The Petty Narcissist Can’t see himself For what he is I’m left to wonder Oh my God I see you in the distance I know you won’t come Around I feel the chasm growing Between you and me Our final game of Pit pat patty whack To see which One of us is strong Enough to leave Still I see you stand In judgment of me I can feel the Arctic Ocean In my bones (Now tell me was I ever good enough, see you stand in judgement) Still I see you stand in judgement of me (Forgiveness is a long road travelled, feel the Arctic Ocean) I can feel the Arctic Ocean, in my bones (And I can feel the chasm growing, feel your waters rising) I can feel your waters rising on me (Our final game of pit pat patty whack, feel the Arctic Ocean) Now I feel the Arctic Ocean in my soul It’s a long way down It’s a long way down It’s a long way... JS
5.
To Be In Love With You 04:12
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I want to be in love with you I want to be in love I want to be in love with you I want to be but I can't We get a little closer But then you slip away You leave me heavy hearted With no words to say I try to paint a picture Preserve you in my mind Because I know one day You will be hard to find I want to be in love with you I want to be in love I want to be in love with you I want to be but I can't But I can’t I’ll sing this song for you This way it’ll last forever I’ll sing this song for you Before we’re over Before we’re over There’s static in our picture All signals fail I just want to see myself I just need to breathe To exhale Ahhhh Ahhhh I want to be in love with you I want to be in love in love in love I want to be in love with you I want to be but I can't I can’t Maybe I can... let’s go!! I want to be in love with you I want to be but I can't JS
6.
What I Want 04:54
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I want your love forever Your love forever It’s breaking my heart Why do I want What I can’t have You’re a desire island With sun shining Blue skies up above Your waves come Crashing on my love Know that I I just want to be with you I’d climb any mountain Just to say When your sun goes down When night becomes your day I just want to be with you Only want to be with you I want to live forever To live forever Deep inside your heart It’s every chamber Lies my fate I want to be forever To be forever The only one you want I pray that I am not too late Know that I I just want to stay with you And I’ll keep on fighting everyday When your sun goes down When night becomes your day I just want to be with you Only want to be with you When your world bares down When skies become your grey I just wanna stay with you Only want to be with you You’ve got sunshine And blue skies You’re all right You’ve got sunshine Why can’t I Be by your side Know that I, I just wanna be with you And I’ll keep on fighting everyday When your sun goes down When night becomes your day I just want to be with you Only want to be with you And when your world bares down When skies become your grey I just wanna stay with you Only want to be with you And when your sun goes down When night becomes your day I just want to stay with you Only want to be with you I want your love forever Your love forever It’s breaking my heart Why do I want What I can’t have... JS
7.
Pool Of Confusion (Let Me In) 04:13
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Is your heart Like a stone I've never felt So alone I'm reaching out To the air I feel the silence Everywhere Last night I kissed you so hard That I lost myself In a pool of confusion That I'm drowning in I would do anything for you I would do anything I would do anything for you Just let me in Lulled to sleep In the comfort of your arms Though my mind kept one eye open I can't compete With the call that tugs your heart Always knew I'd come in second Still I would do anything for you I would do anything I would change my existence To the world you're in I would do anything for you I would do anything I would do anything for you Just let me in I would do anything for you I would do anything I would do anything for you Just let me in Let me in Lemme in Let me in Let me in Lemme in Let me in But your heart Is like a stone You want to be Left alone So when I reach out To the air I'll pretend That you are near And then I'll kiss you so hard That I'll lose myself In a pool of confusion That you won't jump in Oh I would do anything for you I would do anything I would do anything for you Just let me in I would do anything for you I would do anything I would do anything for you Just let me in I would do anything I would do anything Anything for you I would do anything I would Let me in... let me in... let me in... JS
8.
Kynyon & Keesha 03:43
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I prefer not to talk But time's running away This man of few words Now has something to say The love of my life Stands beside me today Oh Keesha I'm here with you to stay We are treading new ground We are moving away From the trials and tribulations Of a cold winter's day The love of my life Stands beside me to stay Oh Keesha You took my heart away I never saw this coming Your warmth and your tender kiss From where we came from Could you imagine this Kynyon and Keesha Together forever in bliss My love found you This man of few words Now has something to say We are treading new ground We are moving away From the trials and tribulations Of a cold winters day Now it's a warm day in Brooklyn It's a warm day in Brooklyn It’s a warm day in Brooklyn Whoah ohhh ohhh Whoah ohhh ohhh Whoah ohhh oooh My love found you Yes my love found you Oh Keesha Oh Keesha My Keesha Kynyon's with you to stay JS
9.
Big Head 04:45
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I took a stroll Along the sidewalk of your soul Only to find That it was sold You think you have it all A camouflage you call love For all your riches You are poor I'm not the one afraid To look you in the eye And ask you questions You don't wanna hear You don't wanna see You lie to yourself And you lie to me Your weakness rears It's ugly head again You've taken on Your biggest role Who was the one Who said they'd Be there in the end Now who will End up all alone I'm not the one afraid To look you in the eye And ask you questions You don't wanna hear You don't wanna see You lie to yourself And you lie to me Oh Don't you know That you can have it all Have it all Don't you know That you can have it all Have it all Just open your eyes My friend... my friend Just open your eyes My friend... my friend My friend I know nothing of love You've thrown this in my face With a condescending scorn Well that's just evidence It's no longer my place I am tired... I am worn I am worn Don't you know That you can have it all Have it all Don't you know That you can have it all Have it all Just open your eyes My friend... my friend Just open your eyes My friend... my friend My friend.. my friend Don't you know That you can have it all You can have it all Don't you know That you can have it all You can have it all Just open your eyes My friend... my friend Just open your eyes My friend... my friend My friend... I took a walk Beside the sidewalk of your soul Chill in the air I felt so cold Now I’m the one Who will not look you in the eye And ask you questions You don't wanna hear You don't wanna see You lie to yourself And you've silenced me... JS
10.
Peter & Shirley 04:10
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They’ve got all the love In the world to give They’ve got the sun They’re okay It’s okay They’ve got all the joy In the world to live on They found the one They’re okay It’s okay And it feels like Spring before the summer Can you hear Listen to what Peter and Shirley say Mmmmmm mmmmmm Peter and Shirley On a beach Surrounded by sun They’re okay It’s okay Peter and Shirley Know a secret The secret of love They’re okay It’s okay And it feels like An afternoon sun shower Can you hear Listen to what Peter and Shirley say Mmmmmm mmmmmm Listen... Mmmmmm mmmmmm They’ve got the love And they’ve got the sun They’re okay It’s okay They’ve got the joy They found each other They’re okay It’s okay And it feels like Spring before the summer Can you hear Listen to what Peter and Shirley say To what Peter and Shirley say Listen... Mmmmmm mmmmmm Listen... Mmmmmm mmmmmm Peter and Shirley Know a secret The secret of love It’s okay We’re okay... JS
11.
I Know 05:04
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This never was my plan Never my intention To love you like this And make you walk away With my hidden resignation There's no excuse for this Is it too late To reach you To hold you 'Cause that is what I need And I I am standing here Before you Yeah And I I'll be waiting You'll see Because I know That we were meant to be Yeah This never was my plan Never my intention To hurt you like this Is it too late To touch you To need you 'Cause that is what I feel And I I am standing here Because I know That we were meant to be Yeah yeah Whoa hey hey Is it too late To take you in my arms Is it too late To undo all this harm That I've done Some of us we falter In the glare of our self doubts Fears take over And my tears take over Now I am without you This never was my plan Never my intention To Love... to love you Yeah And I I am standing here Before you Is it too late To reach you To hold you Because I know We were meant to be Yeah This never was my plan Never my intention To love you like this... JS
12.
Crumble 04:00
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Sometimes I try To pull away from you You've taken all I have to give Still you hunger Sometimes I try To put away this love I feel So heavy Its weight on my heart If you walk away I will crumble I will perish, I will falter, I will die If you go My world will shatter My eyes are now wide open And I can see that you and me We're never meant to be But when I close my eyes I have only one vision Its you and me, just us Yeah... Yeah... If you walk away I will crumble I will perish, I will falter, I will die If you go My world will shatter God only knows the lengths I'd go To find my way If we can slow down Breathe in, breathe out Take stock Slow down and reach in If you walk away I will crumble I will perish, I will falter, I will die If you go My world will shatter God only knows the lengths I'd go To find my way And the strength I have To face each coming day ... will fade JS
13.
Ellen 03:55
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I'm unprepared to say goodbye I'm unprepared for you to close your eyes I know I'll feel it everyday The love you gave in All your special ways Ellen You're so beautiful I'm so afraid to look inside Come face to face With what I cannot hide I walk a tightrope everyday Searching for all the words I need to say Ellen You're so beautiful Oh Ellen You're so beautiful Every minute is an hour Every hour is a day And everyday is a lifetime That slowly fades away Time is moving on I'm unprepared to say goodbye So unprepared I'm left to question why You had to leave me in this way Forever in my heart you'll always stay You'll always stay Ellen You're so beautiful Oh Ellen You're so beautiful Ellen You're so beautiful Oh Ellen Your soul is beautiful I'm unprepared to say goodbye I'm unprepared for you to close your eyes I know I'll feel it every day The love you gave in All your special ways Ellen You're so beautiful Oh Ellen You are so beautiful JS
14.
Oh Fabio 02:48
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Oh Fabio You know I love you You’re the blood That does sustain My beating heart Oh Fabio The first time I saw you Your smile Stripped away my fears But when you took me in your arms The world around us disappeared Never in all these many years I could feel our embrace Was so electric Oh Fabio I always miss you You’re the lungs I need to breathe The oxygen Oh Fabio when you take me by the hand All my worries disappear Because my man he’s oh so near me I could cry a thousand tears Never in a million years Did I ever see our future Come calling You see me Like no one did before And I see you I see deep inside your soul Oh Fabio Let’s not throw this all away This is a once in a lifetime And I need you here to stay I’ll give you all I have to give With you I’ve got so much to live for And I know we can be happy together Forever Oh Fabio Oh Fabio Move in with me Move in with me yeah Oh Fabio You know I love you Oh Fabio Let’s not throw this all away Oh Fabio Jason y Fábio yeah Oh Fabio You know I love you JS

about

It's been seven years since the release of Shand's Because of Zeeva, a time period during which the NYC native singer/songwriter experienced those self-doubts, the ups and downs of life, recently losing his father, and ending some toxic relationships, but also getting married. It was a time period of personal growth resulting in The Petty Narcissist, a collection of very personal songs that traffic in his interpersonal relationships with family, friends, and paramours, as well as some soul searching.

"I'd call The Petty Narcissist my 'personal pop' album. Because of Zeeva was a stepping stone. The Petty Narcissist, however, is everything I wanted and everything I dreamed of being. Beyond proud. My goal with this 14-song collection was to make a substantive personal pop album that not only catered to this single-driven era, but also catered to the old school of having a full length album where each song flows into the other, taking the listener on a sonic storytelling ride. As there are no fillers on this album with every song being a potential single, I'd like to think I succeeded."

Shand composed all the music and lyrics on The Petty Narcissist, and produced the album.

credits

released January 21, 2022

All music and lyrics by Jason Shand

All tracks produced by Jason Shand Except:

‘Crumble’, produced by Luigie Gonzalez and Jason Shand

All songs mixed by Ben Butler
Except:

*Tracks 6 and 7 mixed by John Roggie
**Track 12 mixed by Luigie Gonzalez

Tracks 1 - 5, and 8 recorded at Kaleidoscope Recording Studios, Union City, NJ.

Tracks 6 and 7 mostly done at John Roggie’s home.

Track 11 recorded at Mono Lisa Studios, LIC, NY.

Vocal overdubs recorded at Mono Lisa Studios, LIC, NY.

All other tracking done at various band mates’ houses.

All songs (c) 2021/2022, Jahstork Music, BMI


Mastered by Jeff Lipton and Maria Rice at Peerless Mastering, Boston, MA.

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Jason Shand New York, New York

Jason Shand's goal with this 14-song collection was to make a substantive personal pop album that not only caters to this single-driven era, but also caters to the old school era of having a full length album where each song flows into the other, taking the listener on a sonic storytelling ride.

"With every song being a potential single, I'd like to think I succeeded. Can't wait to release it!" ... more

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